10 Ugly Truth’s of Life
Often we feel life isn’t fair, is it true?
Life as a child can be tough for some and a breeze for others. Why is it like this? What are those thoughts deep under you don’t want to accept, but time and again are reminded they are true? Even our parents hesitate to tell us these, so as not to discourage us, but experience teaches us otherwise.
- Look’s Matter
As kid’s, we are innocent and pure. As we grow older, we get exposed to society, to experiences and to people. This exposure then shapes our inner perception of who we are and your inner self-confidence. The way you look, in a long way will decide how the society perceives you when you are young and shape your self-confidence.
I have seen my niece coming home from school crying, because she was body shamed and teased by kids as young as 7–8 yrs old, just because she was chubby and not good enough in sports. She was singled out as being different, laughed at and made fun of. I have seen people with Vitiligo being treated as untouchables at school and workplace. The Black Lives Matter movement is all about injustice meted out to the Black community because of their colour.
There are now Multibillion Dollar Apps which reward people for their appearance. Instagram, Snapchat, WhatsApp all have filters to make you look more beautiful. Dating apps like Tinder and Bumble, are wholly based on your attractive quotient to help you find a mate. We have Apps which make you look better than you actually are: Face app, BS12, Face Tune etc.
Plastic surgery is now a Billion dollar industry with children as young as 16 opting in. In the age of Kardashian’s, “LOOKS MATTER”!
2. Money does Bring Happiness
“Money isn’t everything, but Everything needs money” ~ Jim Rogers
“I’d say it’s been my biggest problem all my life, it’s money, it takes a lot of money to make these dreams come true” ~ Walt Disney
These quotes will give you a glimpse of why money is important. If you think money can’t buy you happiness, I’m sure it doesn’t make you sad either.
That dream trip to Hawaii, or spending quality time with your family on a vacation in Bahamas. These are experiences which make people happy. But experiences cost money.
Peace of mind brings happiness, but peace of mind comes at a cost, unless you're a monk in the Himalayas who has renounced all worldly possessions.
Millions of people die each year because they can’t afford crucial life saving medicine.
It’s an ugly truth of life, but money stands tall in your journey to Nirvana.
3. You will be taken advantage off
Terms like “Rat Race”, “Bitching”, “Stabbing in Back”, “Being Used” are not taught to us in any school. Rather, we experience these through life. Time is the greatest teacher of all.
Studies have shown that younger people trust more easily. As we grow older, we start trusting less. The reason for this comes from the fact that trust is seen as a weakness by some. It is used against us to their advantage. It may be as simple as your best friend stealing your favourite toy as a kid, or a friend gaining your trust just to have sex with you.
Most famous of them was the story of Bill Gates taking advantage of his friendship with Steve Jobs to steal trade secrets, leading to the creation of Windows, leading him to become the richest person on Earth for decades to come.
Trust is broken in many ways. It makes one feel stupid and helpless, but believe me, it only makes you stronger. Many people will take advantage of your kindness, your empathy or your wealth, but don't let it define the kind of person you want to become in life.
4. How your Parents raise you may well shape your future
I’ve had an abusive father who used to beat up my mother. I’ve had a depressed mother working two jobs trying to raise two kids. The struggle at home as a kid effected me mentally. It made me prone to depression. I never completed my school homework because I never enjoyed being home. I spent most of my time outside, hanging out with friends or in the woods alone, knowing what awaited me back home. I never wanted to be there.
A good atmosphere at home goes a long way in shaping your personality as an adult. Most successful adults have had supportive & encouraging parent’s behind them. Love, affection, care along with a calm, stable atmosphere at home nurtures a child into a bright young adult. Parents are the stepping stone to their child's future, so be a strong one.
5. Education is not the only path to Success
We are told are young kids and young adults how important education is. Parents spend fortunes in giving us the best of education yet, what I learnt was education is not the only way to become successful.
We have thousands of young millionaires in their teens who made money by making YouTube and Facebook videos. We have gaming enthusiasts minting in thousands of dollars live streaming their playtime. Instagram models rake in millions for each post based on their follower base. People as young as 12 have made millions using affiliate marketing. Bloggers and the Gig marketplace is also now a billion dollar industry. Yes, Education does give you a wider choice and more security in the job market, but in no way is the only way to live your dream.
6. Wealthy people will be treated differently
The wealthier you, better the lawyer you can hire, better the lawyer, speedier the justice. Today even a basic human right like justice comes at a cost.
Poor innocent people have spent years behind bars awaiting trial just because they couldn’t afford better lawyers, yet the wealthy are quick to get bail and roam free unless proven guilty.
Airports, concerts, Hotels and everywhere else you go, people are segregated based on their affordability quotient. A first class Traveller breaking rules will be treated differently than an economy class passenger. Another Ugly truth which you just gotta take in your stride.
7. Luck plays a big role in one's success
Luck plays a huge role in one's journey, some just call it Karma. Call it what you may, but this mysterious energy can transform your life in a brief time in unexpected ways.
Take for example my friend Rashi who wanted to be a doctor and was applying to the top medical colleges in the world. Although her grades were satisfactory, it wasn’t good enough for her to be able to crack the top tier. While still waiting for her application to be processed, she decided to go road tripping across Europe. On this one trip, she met a boy who’s father co-incidentally was a professor in one of the top European medical colleges. He helped her get a scholarship in a prestigious institute. She is now a doctor and also a mother to a beautiful kid, living happily in Germany, sharing her life with a person she met on a road trip.
This is how luck plays its part in unknown and sometimes beautiful ways. It doesn’t always happen when you want it. But when it does, it creates magic.
8. Very few of your friends will remain.
Ive had friends in school who I felt strongly for. I believed it was friendship for a lifetime. Slowly, as I progressed over the years, most of them drifted away, now only a couple of them remain. Having thousands of Instagram and Facebook friends doesn’t translate into actual friends who care for you. This is something I realised in my 20's. Friends who stand by you in your sorrow and happiness are your true friends, care for them like they cared for you.
9. Life is not fair
You might be born with certain handicaps, you might have abusive parents, you might lose someone precious early in life, you may be born poor, your parents may not be capable of providing you with the best of education.
Life is unfair, few people are more gifted from the start. I observed some of my friends were naturally smart and beautiful, some were really good at sports, few others were gifted with incredible memory and others with amazing communication skills. One cannot curse their fortunes, we just need to accept and move on. Make best of the cards you are dealt with.
10. God Doesn’t Exist
The Shia-Sunni conflict, Jews holocaust by the Nazi Germany, The Great Rohingya Muslim massacre in Myanmar, The recent beheading’s in France for insulting the Prophet, ISIS and it’s war against the west, these are just to name a few of the crimes against humanity in the name of god. Millions of people have died in the past century in the name of religion. These killings have been indiscriminate and inhumane. Kids, women and old have all been treated alike in these killings. I am sure every one of them had pleaded to god to spare their lives. The notion of God was created to give us hope, to keep us sane in times of distress. It’s just like celebrating Santa Claus knowing he is not actually globe trotting in December giving gifts to the deserving. Although the idea of God and religion is noble, it is us humans who have the power to create a better world and not “GOD”.
Accepting these thoughts as realities in life has helped me to move on. It has given me an understanding about the world we live in. It has rid me of jealousy and other negative feelings. Understanding them has also helped me approach life in a more positive way and be more sympathetic towards myself and others.
Although some of these points may sound harsh, it is a reality based on my experience. It may or may not be true for all. One thing which is true though is, hard-work and persistence can overcome any obstacle. Live life with a smile and go conquer your dreams.
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